Most of us don't really imagine what our first response to "X is missing," will be and that's okay because I believe that no one wakes up and plans to be informed that someone they either know or don't know has gone missing. Karabo Mokoena was found murdered by her boyfriend and it sparked a national outcry with campaign responses such as "Not in our Name" and the "Men are Trash" movement. Without even going into the details of how successful those campaigns were in bringing awareness on gender violence related issues in SA, what shocks me is we, as a society, are so desensitized from a challenge that is causing so much pain and diluting the fabric of who we are as Africans, the ideals of compassion and mutual respect.
When I saw an announcement on twitter about a girl, Tracy that had just gone missing after she failed to arrive home from work, I was really taken aback as a young African woman that there was an overwhelming number
of comments that insinuated she might have been out with her boyfriend/romantic partner they why wouldn't her family know? In the meantime, Tracy is lying in a ditch surviving a kidnapping attempt. The audacity to refocus agency on gender violence to suggest compliance by the very same people that are marginalized and victimized makes me want to throw up and it says so much about whether South African men are willing to accept that THEY ARE THE PROBLEM. There really is no other reason that SA is ranked 1st globally in the rate of femicide.