In the African set-up, talking about family issues like sex, domestic violence, and other marital matters is unwelcome, leaving many women frustrated, whereas sharing would have helped to find solutions to the problems.
Being an African woman living in a Muslim dominated region makes it even worse. Islam is conservative and as such, women should submit to their husbands despite the many family issues that they might go through in the process.
But this is changing in Nigeria thanks to Ziya’atulhaqq Usman Tahir, 27, who lives in the northern state of Bauchi which is largely Muslim.
The wedding caterer created an anonymous account @fatibolady, which she uses it to highlight the plight of women in the region. Through this platform, women engage in discussions on sensitive personal issues that they would have otherwise bottled up.
How did it all start?
Tahir told BuzzFeed News that it started when she posted an innocent post about a friend in hope of receiving feedback to help her.
Since then, the page grew to a platform where women wrote to her on a daily basis seeking guidance on some disturbing issues.
In a day, Tahir receives more than 20 emails which she has to sift through to find which ones are best to post. This she said is overwhelming but she is relentlessly seeking to help the women. She takes screenshots of the emails and texts and post them anonymously @fatibolady where she and the followers try to come up with best advice possible for the women.
Already the account has more than 53,000 followers with each post generating significant reactions from the group.
Agony aunt as she is commonly referred in the platform, directs some emails to qualified law and mental health experts for additional help.
A problem shared is half solved
Tahir encourages people to talk about their problems.
“I don’t think bottling up your problem helps,” Tahir said. “I think people should talk about their problems.”
The young lady is bringing a wave of change in Nigeria and she hopes that someday she can develop this into a TV show to help even more women.
“I don’t want anybody to be stigmatized,” she told BuzzFeed News. “You should talk about what’s happening in your home so that people can help you.”
Already, Tahir said she is planning on establishing a blog.
Image Credit: Courtesy of Ziya’atulhaqq Usman Tahir